Monday, April 23, 2012

"Bang your head...Metal health will drive you mad!"

Hey folks. Enjoy the weekend? I'll take that as a yes/no.

Well today's skit is one long since done and in the can(no not that can you sickos) so enjoy.

Iron Man: "I'm Heavy Metal!"
Thor: "I say thee nay; I am heavy metal!"

Iron Man: "Am not!"
Thor: "'Tis true friend Tony!"
Iron Man: "Am not!"
Thor: "'Tis true!"

Iron Man: "Hey Steve, help us settle this thing between Thor and I. I say I'm Heavy Metal because, well look at me; I'm wearing a suit of metal armor, so I'm more heavy metal than Thor."

Thor: "I say thee no good Captain! I am Thor, God of Thunder! I am the very inspiration behind the very genre and every heavy metal band past, present, and future!"

Captain America: "That's a good point Thor."

Iron Man: "Maybe that weird Swedish metal crap, but not Metal in general! Hell, Black Sabbath named a song after me for God's Sake! It's even the main soundtrack in my movies. You don't even have your own song."

Captain America: "Tony made a good point there Thor, so-"

Thor: "Watch where thy tread friend Tony! You forgeth who thou speakth to. I am the very God of Heavy Metal Thunder, as the noble Steppenwolf and KISS both doth proclaim."

Iron Man: "Bullshit! you are not heavy metal!"

Thor: "'Tis so foul pretender!"

Iron Man: "Am not!"

Captain America: "Guys c'mon on, this is getting a little ridiculous here."

Captain America: "Guys! Guys!"

Thor: "'Tis true!"
Iron Man: "Am not!"
Thor: "'Verily I say, 'tis true!"
Iron Man: "Are not,I am!"

Thor: "I say thee nay! My father Odin and Brother Ronnie Dio(who doth dwell now in the halls of Valhalla) hath decreed it so!"

Iron Man: "The hell he did, plus he could never replace Ozzy Osbourne. And I'm heavy metal!"
Thor: "'Tis not, I am!"
Iron Man: "No,I am!"

Captain America: "Oh the hell with this! I'm gonna' go listen to my Glen Miller records!"

Thor: "I am!"
Iron Man: "No,I am!"

Well people, what do you think? Personally, they both make strong arguments for their respective cases, but they both are, so that should be that.

As always, feel free to hit me up on the comments section, and let me know what you guys think. Suggestions for future skits are also welcome as a couple you have already told me what you'd like to see, so feel free to suggest away. 


Dale Bagwell said...

Found this while looking for old Twisted Toyfare scans. It really fits the skit somehow...

Dan said...

I side with Thor. I haven't met a metaller yet who wouldn't have his inspiration airbrushed on their instrument case.

Maybe Cap needs to point out he made it into the lyrics of Paradise City by Guns and Roses and kick both their arses!

"Captain America's been torn apart
Now he's a court jester with a broken heart
He said "turn me around and take me back to the start"
I must be losing my mind "are you blind?"
I've seen it all a million times"

(Add awesome air guitar solo to finish.)

Dale Bagwell said...

-Dan, that is very very true. Can't believe I forgot that. I'll be sure to add that in some time in the future.

And yes, wizards and Norse gods have long been airbrushed on everything ranging from instruments to sweet, sweet vans.

Thanks for the input man.

Dan said...

Hard to believe all I wanted to be back in the day was Axel Rose. I'd still have a airbrushed panel van though - that stuff never goes stale.

Dale Bagwell said...

Ha ha, no I guess not. A couple of years back on American cable, there is this channel called Spike, and it had a Jean Claude Van Damme movie marathon. The guy/actor hosting the marathon had a van airbrushed all over with Van Damme's likeness. Crazy!

Dale Bagwell said...

Oh I just remembered, Elton John, while not very heavy metal at all, also wrote a song about Thor called Valhalla. It's a personal favorite of mine!

"Get Snakey"

Hey whattaya' know, it's a brand new skit this week. Enjoy this fun little homage to one of the more recently popular "danc...