I've always wanted to do something with my Ric Flair figure, and I think I did one with Tony Stark a few years back, but otherwise ol' Slick Ric's been criminally underused around here.
Btw, seriously guys, if you haven't already, please go watch that 30 for 30 ESPN special on Ric Flair's life. It's so good and damn informative. A very brutally honest look at the Nature Boy, but still damn inspiring.
Lastly, I just now got around to watching the first two episodes of the 1st season of Game Of Thrones.
Yeah I know, I know "What took you so long?" or "You're just now watching that?"
Well it's not like I haven't heard of it before, especially from Googum, I've just never watched it because it was on a channel I don't get, and I wasn't that super interested in seeing it anyways.
But I kinda had to this time, because a good friend of mine burned me the 1st season, so late last night I watch the first two episodes. Not bad, but I still don't see what the hype's all about. Peter Dinklage is pretty damn cool though; I love the wit and personality of the guy, so I'm sure we'd probably chase some whores and booze together if the opportunity ever arose.
I must say, I'm currently crushing on that white-haired chick, Emilia Clarke. She's hot and she's naked already just two episodes in? Love it. So, so far, so good. I'll let you guys know how I feel about the rest of the season.
Welcome to the first post of the new month. I promise to put on a hell of a show for you today,
so enjoy
Speaking of fun, you recognize this commercial?
Yeah I know, I know. God bless him though, as he's still going, living like it's 1986 and he's on top of the world. Of course if it really was 1986 again, that still wouldn't be enough time to for him to save up money to pay off the millions.....and millions, he owes the in back taxes to the IRS. Sad but true.
Anyways, as is the custom here at the House of Fun, I parody the shit out these unintentionally funny commercials as only I can.
I dare you not to laugh.......
Trigon: "Whew! Man, looking for my other arm and leg is really taking a lot out of me. I need to drink some blood quick, or sacrifice some of those delightful crack babies everyone's raving about, because I am tired."
Things look bleak for Trigon until all of a sudden......
WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Ric Flair(God): "Woooooo! The souls of those poor little crack babies wouldn't drain themselves. Here, why don't you drink this energy shot and get that blood and demonic energy pumping again. It really puts the wooooooo! in my WOOOOOO!
Don't forget to to spay and neuter your kids! Wooooooo!"
Trigon: "I don't know what the hell that was all about, but now I'll be able to find the rest of me and conquer this pitiful planet and all its dimensions in no time. Thank you Ric Flair. You lovable broke bastard! Wooo indeed ."
Elsewhere we find.......
Iron Man: "Hic', Uh, uh, Harmpfhhfh! Oh, oh God! That was worse than the last one! G**damn Matt Fraction for costing me my hard-fought sobriety and making me a stinking drunk again! I swear, when I find him I'm going to repulsor blast his fucking face right off! Hurmph!
Oh, uh, I think it just came out of both ends! Rhodey! Rhodey! Come quick and clean me up. I just had an accident in my suit. Oh, god the smell...."
And then all of a sudden.....
WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Iron Man: "Oh no!"
Ric Flair: "Wooooo! Hello Tony. Looks like you're in need of a serious pick me up champ."
Iron Man: "Oh Steve Jobs no! Not you again! Last time we partied together, you out drank me and stole all the women."
-It's true kids he did!
Ric Flair: "Here, drink my new and improved energy shot. One drink of my energy shot, and you'll be back to pounding those drinks hard , and pounding the women even harder. Wooooooo!"
Iron Man: "Well, fuck it! It's not like my day can get any worse right? Wait what was that? Reboot in the MU? Bendis leaving the Avengers? Noooooooooo!"
Elsewhere again......
Red Arrow: "Ughh man! I'm so wiped out from that last 48 hour Heroin binge while watching that Young Justice marathon, that I don't have enough energy left in me to shot up my last batch."
Then suddenly......
Wooooooooo!
Red Arrow: "Whaa!?"
Ric Flair: "Wooooo! What's the matter little Brother, got Iced again?
Red Arrow: "Uh yeah, you can say that."
Ric Flair: "Well don't worry, because the 16! 16! 16! 16! 16 time World Heavyweight champion of the world has got just the energy shot for you. After drinking a shot of this, you'll be ready to get back on the horse again. Woooooo!
Red Arrow: "Wow Ric Flair, thanks!"
Ric Flair: "That's right. Drink Ric Flair's energy shot. It puts the woooooo! in my Wooooooo!
Did I ever tell you how me and the 4 Horsemen used to party all night and party a little longer? Woooo! It's true brother."
Red Arrow: "Wait, you and 3 other guys used to do Heroine so much you named yourselves after it? Fuckin' Sweeeeet!"
Red Arrow: "Huh, what!? What the hell just happened? Oh man, I think I just hallucinated that Ric Flair was here. That's weird. Oh well, thanks to that little nap, I can get back to doing what I do best: Shooting......Heroin. Ha, you though I was gonna' say arrows huh? Suckers."
I was talking to Goo this weekend, and he mentioned that he was working on a skit with the Atom and Black Hand, and I had completed this one about with the same characters, so I knew I had to hussle and put this baby out quick before he posted his.
So without further ado-doo, "Nok, nok, who's there?"
Black Hand: "Ah, greetings Brother Atom."
Atom: "Black hand? What are you doing here? I thought you were dead?"
Black Hand: "I thought you knew. I'm a member of the Indigo Tribe, Indigo Girls, something like that, just like you now. I'd throw up a peace sign, but my hands are unfortunately stuck like this. So peace to you brother."
Atom: "What, Indigo Girls?"
Black Hand: "Yeah, the Indigo Girls. You know; 90's Alternative-Rock Lesbo group? Lilth Fair? Any of this ringing any bells?"
Atom: "Sorry, I'm more of a Country western fan myself."
Black Hand: "By the look of your attire I'll bet. Anyways...nok, nok, and all that."
Black Hand: "You know all this nok, nok stuff seems like a set-up for a stupid knock-knock joke, except not as funny."
Atom: "You know, now that you mention it it sure does doesn't it? Oh man, what in the hell was Geoff Johns smoking when he made up that whole thing?"
Black Hand: "Probably the same stuff you were when you put that outfit together Nature Boy."
Ric Flair: "Did someone say Nature Boy? Woooooooo!"
Today's skit revolves around one of my favorite Quentin Tarenteno movies, Jackie Brown. If you haven't seen it yet(and it's been out since 1996) I highly recommend watching it. It's Quentin's ode to to those old and funny Blaxsplotation movies of the 70's.
