Welcome to a place where the spirit of Fuckery, Toyfare and Robot Chicken live, and action figures do bad things to each other.
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Just to get you guys in the mood for today's skit, I provided a little soundtrack that'll get you in the right frame of mind, courtesy of the Ohio Players and their hit single "Fire". So sit back and take a listen.
Don't mind me, I'll wait for ya'.
Okay, you ready? Good.
Firestorm: "Uh, should we be you know, standing next to each other? I figured we both might blow up or something if we're standing too close together."
Pyro: "Bugger if I care mate. That's why I'm a super-villain, so's I don't have to follow any bleeding rules or orders as such. Like my dad used to say, No rules, just right!"
Firestorm: "Uh, I think that's the slogan for Outback Stackhouse you're referring to."
Pyro: "You calling me ol' man a Jack of tall tales? That he ain't dinkum? You bloody angora! I outta' burn ya' damn lips off!"
Firestorm: "What the hell are you talking about? And who's a jack a what? And I'm pretty sure I don't have an angora; I have a penis thank you very much. Although now that I think about it, I do have an Aunt Flora... I think. Anyways, learn to speak English man! Maybe that's why you get into so many fights."
Pyro: "Piss off ya' bloody wanker!"
Captain Atom: "Hey guys what's up?"
Firestorm: "Okay, now we should be worried."
Firestorm: "Hey! Those are mine! Give 'em back!"
Captain Atom: "Sorry soldier but I just bought a timeshare for these babies, and I aim to get my money's worth."
So how'd I do Dan? I think I'm slowly, but surely getting the hang of Australian slang. Of course being able to look this shit up on the internets(yes internets for you Prince fans) makes things super easy for me.
One of the words I just happened to see, is Liquid Laugh. That's Aussie slang for vomiting/puking. I had a good laugh myself off of that one.
Speaking of puking, here's a funny little embrassing personal story of mine:
I was in 4th grade at the time, and me and some classmates were talking about different colored-boobs. Yeah I know, real highbrow stuff for a 10 yr-old. Don't ask me how we got on that topic but we did. So we all start to get really ridiculous by just calling out different colors of boobs, again real highbow stuff here.
So I start laughing, and laughing, all while eating big bites of pizza in-between all this. Well I laugh so hard, I forget to swallow, and I start choking. The really messed up part is, I was laughing and choking at the same time, because for some fucked up reason, I was too damn amused by the image of different-colored breasts, to stop and deal with me choking. So from there I proceeded to puke, and I mean puke hardcore, all the while I'm still laughing my ass off! Everybody at the table scattered like roaches when you turn on the lights, and quickly moved away from the colorful, liquid pyrotechnics shooting out of my mouth. What's funny is they were both disgusted, yet were laughing at me, and I was laughing at myself and the brightly-colored boobs too!
After that a kind custodian saw what was going on, took me outside, and performed the Heimlich maneuver on me.
I was fine after that, and even got a free 2nd lunch to boot. And you know what? I still laughed even after all that. Yeah, what can I say, I was a silly ,stupid kid back then, except now I'm just a silly, stupid man.
And that was one of many adventures I had while doing the liquid laugh. Literally!
Have a good weekend folks, and please don't laugh and puke at the same time. It's not for everyone!