'Tis that time again where we here @ The House of Fun play everybody's favorite game show,
All this month, So, Who Would Win? will have a Halloween theme, so expect any of the coming participants to have a horror theme or be directly inspired by the horror genre.
This week, I'm pitting Godzilla, the king of all monsters against the
That's right, it's the King of Monsters against Marvel's green gamma-irradiated monster in a battle to see who's the toughest radiation-fueled engine of destruction.
Let's take a look and compare their stats and see just how they match up to each other shall we?
-Godzilla:
-Hulk:
| Abilities | As Bruce Banner:
As Hulk:
|
|---|
Let's also take Godzilla's size in consideration. Originally he was no more than 164 ft tall. But as of 2019, he's been upgraded to being around 393 ft. Damn. Good thing Hulk can leap pretty high huh?
And let's be honest, due to the sheer size and regenerative abilities of both combatants, expect to this fight to last a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time and threaten to turn the planet into a giant wrecking yard with all the property damage they'd do, not to mention the incredible amount of bystander casualties and injuries as a result of this fight.
As a side note, last week I was over at a friend's house and the 1998 remake to Godzilla was on.
Now I don't have to tell how bad that movie was. Thank Harambe I never watched it up until that moment, and then with both of us mutually acknowledging how bad it was, we almost had to finish it since it's a car wreck on film.
I took 5 things away from that whole abortion of a reboot:
1). That 90's reimaging was and still is horrible. Godzilla looked more like a dollar store knock off how you'd expect Godzilla to look. Horrible. Maybe the reused material from all those Jurassic Park movies during the same decade, idk.
2). Flame breath? More like lame breath. Why they removed his trademark atomic breath I have no idea. Plus he was asexual to boot.
3). Whoever cast Matthew Broderick in this thing should've been shot and violently killed. Seriously. It was like watching an unintended Ferris Bueller/Godzilla crossover movie. And not in a good way....at all!
4). I was fucking disgusted with Jimmy Page for cheaping Led Zeppelin's legacy when he did that god-awful collaboration with P. Diddy. It really took me a long time to let that one go. It still irks the fuck out of me that he allowed Kashmir to be sampled and fucked with like it was. The fucked up thing is, I believe the song out-lasted the movie in both sales and popularity.
5). Broderick's ex-girlfriend/love interest was written as an opportunistic, shitty reporter who stole the tape that proved Godzilla existed, which in turn cost him his nice, cushy government job. And yet we're supposed to feel sympathetic for her? Fuck that. Bitch cost him his job and almost his life. The best thing they ever did was to break up in first place.
Rant over, but hopefully you all out there never saw it either.
Back to the fight at hand as it were....
So,
VS.
Godzilla
VS.
The Immortal Hulk
Who wins and why?
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