So today I'm, debuting a new skit feature that's not unlike what my friends and sometime do to each other; basically you post a picture of yourself, inviting other people to roast or make fun of you.
Yes I assure you this is an actual thing, which if you're on Facebook a lot, then you've probably seen other people doing this. So I figured, what the hell, I'll roast some of our favorite comic book heroes and villains in a similar fashion, but the difference is I'm picking ten of the best roasts I can make up to use against said hero/heroine/villain/villainess. Got it? Good.
And hey, feel free to contribute your own roast comment here as well.
Today's first sacrificial lamb is a beloved cult favorite hero from DC Comics, the Blue Devil.
Now we told BD that this whole thing was for any charity of his choice, but what he doesn't know is we totally lied like a motherfucker.
Enjoy!!!!!!
Ha ha, thanks for being such a good sport about everything BD.
No, not really, but yeah, let's hear it for fake enthusiasm eh?
Speaking of enthusiasm, Tax Day is tomorrow for those living on this side of the pond.
I'm not worried, but then I'm not the kind of lazy ass(though lazy I may be) who waits until the today or tomorrow to file a tax return. Christmas/holiday/birthday shopping I can see waiting until the last minute, if only because of time constraints. But tax returns? Just fucking do it and be done with it. Unless you like being audited by the IRS, then by all means, go for it.
Anyhoo.......
Today is the debut of a new skit, as is custom around here the beginning of each new week.
Today, I'm channeling the 90's, with this one-hit techno wonder by the German group Eiffel 65 and their one hit, "Blue".
Enjoy.
The End
Well Ted did ask a very good question. Who knew Blue Devil was such a cheapskate?
Today's going be a real, shorty-short one folks.
Why you my ask? Well I'm feeling a little lazy, but I also have to pack for my birthday weekend trip, so there.
Oh don't worry, I'll be back by Monday. And if not, well then I guess one of the fab Four(no not those fab four) can play rocks, paper, scissors to see who gets to run the House.
Knowing them, they'll just turn it into a frat house filled with strippers, loose women, and all the beer you can drink.
Well that just sucks; throwing a kick-ass party like that only after I'm gone. Some friends:(
Anyhoo,
today's short-shot involves the Blue Devil, so enjoy!
-Blue Devil climbs up out of the dark chamber.
Blue Devil: "Whew! Damn, that was some work climbing up out of there. Ugh! I think I saw my dignity and Dan Didio's soul down there. Coincidence? I think not."
-Blue Devil looks back down
"Yep. They're down there all right. And look, there's the entire pre-rebooted DCU continuity down there too. Huh. Far out. Sad, but far out."
What? Hey I feel as a paying customer, and yes I still do occasionally buy DC Comics,( But more often than not its the trades I buy nowadays) that I can readily and willfully rip on books that out right suck.
If you've followed this blog long enough, then it should be no surprise that I openly have disdain for Dan Didio and the current editorial regime over there. I'm not blaming, nor do I have issues with the characters themselves. I'm not because they're simply imaginary characters subject to the whim of the very company that owns them. So it's not their fault when they act uncharacteristically and say and do shit they wouldn't normally do(i.e. the current Justice League title). And no, I can't blame the entire company, since that entails blaming the production staff, trade paperback staff, and various other groups of workers. So I won't, although I will throw the crew responsible for the DCUC toy line in there based off the repeatedly stupid and asinine decisions they've made lately regarding that line's fate.
But that's besides the point.
I know I've bitched about this repeatedly, so I'll stop for now, but I abso-fucking-lutley hate the reboot! I don't care what people or some comic professionals say, the reboot makes no sense and is completely unnecessary. I'll leave it to other, more comic industry-oriented websites like Bleedingcool.com can supply you with the exact sales figures, but by and large they haven't super-boosted the industry. Some say it was the shot in the arm, the industry needed. Really? 30-odd years of continuity flushed down the drain just so the company could justify new shiny #1's and ugly costumes?
That and they needed to reboot everything just to publish digital comics? I'm pretty sure they could have done that and left things they way they were. And aside from the horrible Teen Titans and Superboy rebooted relaunches, you honestly expect me to believe they couldn't have told the types of stories they have so far and put out the types of books they had without having to go through the rebooting process?
Not buying it. Especially when you see titles like GL, Batman, and even Aquaman go on like nothing's really happened.
But I digress. I know, I know, I just have to get over it like everyone else did, but still......
Anyhoo, I'll leave you guys with something positive and fun, since I am Mr. Morbid and not Mr. Angry, and this is the House of Fun, and not the House of complaining. So with that in mind, here's some INXS, and their hit "Devil Inside."
And hey I'm not complaining because I'm doing what I love, but the next two guys in today's skit aren't as happy about their current employment status. Will that change? Let's find out.
Blue Devil: "So, it looks like we're back in business now with the whole reboot thing going on. It does feel good to be employed again, but I'll admit I'm not too crazy about my new outfit. See?
It's like I died and woke and up in Rob Halford's closet, mixed with a little Chris Angel for extra spice. Eww!
Oh, and here's yours:
That one kind of looks just like your old one."
Black Vulcan: "Whatever man, that don't even look like me. And shit, at least you got a job man. I mean I have all these damn powers, and I still don't even rate a money loan commercial or a kid's birthday party!"
Blue Devil: "Hey don't knock a kid's birthday party man! All the free cake and ice cream you want, and sometimes you get to hook up with a single mom or desperate housewife. Heh, heh. Not bad for a clown gig huh? Besides, we both have jobs now partner. You're in the same rebooted boat as me Black Lighting. Yeah!"
Black Vulcan: "I'm not Black Lighting fool! I'm Black Vulcan! Damn, even the blue-skinned demon guy shows me no respect."
Blue Devil: "Oh shit, I'm sorry man. It's just....you......well you know?"
Black Vulcan: "Know what you horned, honky racist? That all of us black guys with electrical powers look the same? Is that what you were gonna' say? Man fuck you and John Wayne!"
Blue Devil: "Well yeah, don't you?"
Black Vulcan: "*Sigh*....Yes. I blame it on those motherf**king white devils in charge over at DC. They screwed Tony Isabella, and now they're screwing me. Damn!"
This is dedicated to Tony Isabella, famous creator of Black Lighting. If you know anything about his long problematic history with DC, then you know how the recent developments hasn't exactly helped their strained relationship any. It looks like DC is looking for a possible legal loophole by possibly/maybe renaming Black Lighting to Black Lightening, as a way to retain sole ownership of said character. Dirty, dirty move DC! And yes, just changing those few letters makes the possibly new name look that much more ridiculous.
I really just don't get what is up with DC lately. They've successfully screwed over the creators of Superman, forced CC Beck out of business and then bought up Captain Marvel only to continually shit on him and his family, run off and royally screwed Alan Moore over the rights to Watchmen, and of course this as well.
Is it due to the inherent corruptness and greed of corporations/large businesses, that when they reach level, they automatically turn into grade-A assholes?
And yes I know they're a business in a business to make money, but that doesn't mean you have to leave your morals and good conscience at the door.
Well on to brighter topics, as the action figure Gods smiled down on me recently. While I had no luck @ Wal-Mart, I did stumble onto some really nice finds @ K-Mart.
Right now they seem to have a 50% off sale on all toys, and really helped me out when I found these in giant aisle display:
Yeah these guys.
I intitally skipped them the last time I was @ Toys R' Us, but then I found them buried behind the new Batman movie figures of Bane and Batman. I was going to just buy Catwoman, but then she rang up as only 6$. Ha, ha! So I quckly ran back, and picked up the 1st App. Batman as well.
You can go to Itsalltrue.net for a real comprehensive review, but take it from me, these are really nice figures.
Then I saw another figure there that isn't usually there:
Yep, this is the Arkham Asylum version of Nightwing, but carried on the Batman: Legacy wave. I passed him over last Friday, but then after reading and watching some reviews on him, decided to snatch him up yesterday. And yes, he too was only 6$. Go me.
Normally I wouldn't get a DC figure that wasn't exclusively from the DCUC brand. Just ask Goo about how far my snobbery goes concerning only buying those and Marvel Legends figures. But since he was roughly in the same scale, and has mostly the same type of articulation you'd find on the DCUC version, I got him anyways. The pain job's snazzy, and he looks great detail-wise. He comes w/ his black sticks, and a small mini-poster, as do all/most figures from the Batman: Legacy line.
Plus I'm really not sure when I'll have an opportunity outside of buying the DCUC version online, to get a Nightwing figure.
Speaking of Wally world, I was surprised to find this little bugger there near the magazine section:
For only 10$, I got this nice TPB. It collects Batman: Vengence of Bane, Bane of the Demon, and some excerpts/origins from the 52 series.
So not a bad read, and it really gets the reader and/or potential new fan into the last Nolan directed Batman movie that comes out July 20th. I myself can't wait, and will break my solemn vow just this once, to go to an actual movie theater, brave those miserable and annoying kids/teens/tweens, and watch the Goddamn Batman on a movie screen. Folks I haven't watched done this since the last one came out a couple of years ago. So I'm really stoked to see it.
So what did you do this past weekend?
Also, a possible new feature over at the House of Fun, is video of the theme song for the day.
I see it as another chance to show of my musical knowledge and interests. You fortunate people can be entertained and possibly be introduced, or re-introduced to old/new classics.
For today's selection, I picked a very appropriate song, given the today's topic.
Here's Public Enemy, and one of many hits from them, "Fight the power".
What? Who said you had to be only black to enjoy PE?
